JOKE TIME JOKE TIME!

Guys Guys Guys!

POST ANY FUNNY/GOOD JOKES U KNOW....(optional ofc)

!!!!

Ya mum’s so fat that if she buys a fur coat that species would be extinct
Ya mum’s so dumb she bought a video tape on how to fix your vcr
Ya mum’s like a vacuum cleaner cause she sucks, she blows and gets laid in the closet
Ya mum’s so ugly she makes blind children cry
Ya mum’s that when she goes on the scales it says ‘this is not a group activity’
Ya mum’s so fat she uses a mattress as a tampon
Ya mum’s so stupid she put a battery up her ass and said ‘I’ve got the power’
Ya mum’s so fat she got busted at the airport for having 200 pounds of crack
Ya mum’s she has to use the empire state building as a dildo
Ya mum’s so fat she got baptized at Sea World
Ya mum’s so fat she makes a killer-whale look like a tic-tac
Ya mum’s like a bowling ball, you stick two fingers in her she comes back for more
Ya mum’s so that when she sees a whale she starts singing ‘We are family’
Ya mum’s so dumb she die of hunger in a grocery store
Ya mum’s so stinky that when she opens her legs your dad is unconscious for 3 days
Ya mum’s so fat when she went bowling, she fell over and got a strike
Ya mum’s so dumb she threw a rock at the ground and missed
Ya mum’s so fat nobody knew which cow to milk
Ya mum’s like the Bermuda triangle, she swallowed a lot of seamen
Ya mum’s so dumb she sits on the t.v and watches the couch
Ya mum’s so old she sat behind Jesus in the 3rd grade
Ya mum’s so ugly that when she was born her doctors slapped her parents
Ya mum’s so small you can see her feet on her drivers license
Ya mum’s so old her birth certificate says expired
Ya mum’s so fat her belt size is ‘equator’
Ya mum’s so fat her shadow destroyed the planet
Ya mum’s so ugly she uses make-up made by a company called ‘why bother’
Ya mum’s such an animal her blood type is raccoon
Ya mum’s so fat that when she tried to get a tan the sun ran out of strength
Ya mum’s so dumb she climbed over a glass wall to see what was over the other side
Ya mum’s so fat she plays pool with the planets
Ya mum’s so fat her family photos were taken by satellite
Ya mum’s so fat she’s on both sides of the family
Ya mum’s such a bad cook her family prays after their meal
Ya mum’s so dumb that when someone said ‘drinks are on the house’ she climbed on the roof
Ya mum’s so dumb she thought IQ was a disease

holy F ck to3y...

you added alot!

ill post mine in tomorow

rofl, k, waiting on you haha

NOTE: this joke may hurt and it will take time to read..

OK!...
there was a man he goes to the doctor and asks..."doctor can u help me i have an aching back problem and it has been happening for a while", the doctor replies "ok no problem we will take you to the cat-scanner (or w/e) and take a look where your problem is being caused".....2 hours later they go back to the office and the doctor says to the man "im sorry to say but your balls are hanging on your back and thats causing ur problem, the only way we can fix this is to cut them off" the man replies "shit....well as long as i wont feel anymore aching" (and doctor cuts em off * F***IN OUCH*)..

after the man walks out the hospital he feels great so he goes shopping for new clothes, he goes to a shop and asks the salesman "hi, can i have a shirt please" the salesperson replies "sure your a size 42 correct?" the man says Wow your right how did u know? the sales person replies "i have a lot of experience" man goes "cool, then can i have shorts please" the salesperson says "ok size 38 correct?" the man replies "WoW! again?....your good" the sales person replies "thankyou"... so then the man asks "underwear please" the sales person says " lemme guess...size 34?" the man says "WTF NOO!?!..im size 29" the sales person says WTF!!!! .....Size 29...wearing that wud make ur balls hang to the back of your spine".....


ouch :\

LOLOLOLOL nice one, i like long jokes for the massive buid up, makes the punchline come in stronger

hahaha cool, HEY H3ADSHOT, GUYS CMON POST IN YE JOKES!

chippyguy999 wrote:

hahaha cool, HEY H3ADSHOT, GUYS CMON POST IN YE JOKES!

no

awwwww..

killjoy >_>

post one pweeese or face my red camo'd AK47!!!!

chippyguy999 wrote:

awwwww..

killjoy >_> *no scopes H3ADSHOT*

post one pweeese or face my red camo'd AK47!!!! *aims AK47 at H3ADSHOT*

re-phrase that or it will have to be deleted

Ha.
You wish, I'll pwn you with my gold AK-47 and gold M1014 shotgun combo pack.
Anyways here you go:


One day a blonde and a brunette were walking down to the grocery store when the brunette pointed out to the blonde "oh, hey look at that dead bird.."

The blonde looks around around up in the sky for a few minutes and says "hmm, I don't see any dead ones."



A guy decides to bring his new blonde girlfriend to a football game. After the game is over, he asks her if she liked the game.

She replies: "Oh it was great, I loved watching those men in tight clothes, but there is one thing I don't understand."

"What did you not understand ?"

And the blonde says: "Well, at the begginning of the game, both teams flipped a quarter to see who would kick off first. Then the rest of the game everybody was yelling get the quarter back, get the quarter back, get the quarter back. So I thought to myself, gosh it's just a quarter!"

lmao at the quarter back one

Loling at quater back